When your nicely-planned life and career take a turn for the unexpected, it’s easy to let yourself get dragged down, crawl into a hole, and end up feeling like a total failure.
Or… you could do like My Good Woman, Elise Pettus, and realize that the kind of support you need doesn’t exist yet, find a dozen kindred souls, and start building the movement you know your people need.
Elise is the Founder and Editorial Director of UNtied, an online community that connects women navigating separation and divorce so they can support and educate one another through the process.
Elise took “the worst that could happen” and turned it into her inspiration and motivation to become a bold leader for the thousands of women in her community.
In this episode Elise and I discuss
- How Elise’s divorce inspired her to found UNtied – now a thriving community with over 3000 members.
- How to be brave when you’re shy, and why flipping your “leadership switch” can help you become more courageous on behalf of others.
- Growing a small gathering of women into a community of thousands
This episode at a glance:
[06:44] When the worst has already happened, it removes a lot of the fear that would otherwise stop you from taking risks and doing awesome things.
[20:13] How growing a big movement can start small and organically – by filling a void and creating what your people tell you they need.
[30:35] If what you want to offer (and what your people need) doesn’t exist yet, then build your own model and pave your own road.
[42:06] Giving people you work with permission to boss you around and use their “stern math teacher voice” – so you can stop being in your own head and get more and better things done.
[44:02] Helping your people feel safe enough to be vulnerable around you, so you can have open conversations about the best way to work together.
[47:11] “Hard skills” directly impact revenue and move the needle. But a business is made up of people, and you need the “soft skills” to work with them effectively.
[53:58] If Elise had a do-over, the only thing she’d change is to ask for help or find a strategic partner (or business coach) sooner.
[53:58] The main element Elise loves to bring out in people is resilience. It’s hard work but so worth it.
[01:04:50] Elise’s essential advice for women going through a divorce.
Resources and links mentioned in this episode
- Check out UNtied – The Thinking Woman’s Divorce Resource
- Follow Elise on Instagram (@Untiedllc), LinkedIn and/or YouTube
- Read the 2015 New York Times article that put UNtied on the map
- Tools Elise mentions: Asana, Google Drive, Dropbox, and ActiveCampaign
- Get the amazing Year Task Planner that helps Elise get everything done
- Watch Paris is Burning – the fabulous movie about the 1980s drag scene in New York.
- Meet playwright, screenwriter, novelist, musician and marvelous multitasker, Suzan-Lori Parks
- Never heard of the Pomodoro Technique? This article explains how you can use it to get into the zone and stay focused for short periods of time.
NOTE: Elise talked about tech struggles in this episode and mentioned her past experience with a few different email providers. BUT… tools and capabilities change so fast in the online world, so I highly recommend you do your own research before making those big techy decisions for your business.
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- Learn how to establish trust between you and your team members
- Different communication styles and how to leverage your style when you’re working with others
- Rewarding great work: why it matters and how to do it
