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How To Break Free From The Perfectionism Trap And Unleash Your Leadership Power

by | Feb 8, 2022 | Perfectionism

Perfectionism can be a crippling personality trait, especially for women. We want to be perfect – to have perfect ideas, make perfect decisions, and lead perfectly happy and satisfied teams.

But maintaining perfection is simply not possible. It keeps us from taking risks, moving forward, and achieving our goals. Not only that, it can take a serious toll on our mental health and well-being.

As a female leader, it’s important to remember that you aren’t perfect… but you don’t have to be! You just have to be brave enough to speak up, make a move, and take the lead, in spite of that.

Here are six ways to help you let go of being perfect and start leading with power.

1. Realize That Perfection Is An Illusion

The perfect moment doesn’t exist. There’s always something you can improve, something you can do better. You can always be better trained, better prepared, more experienced. It’s a never-ending cycle. So stop waiting for “perfection” and go ahead and take action.

"Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of change." - Anne Lamott

Leadership isn’t about being perfect; it’s about making things happen despite our imperfections. The steps you take may not be perfect, but they will be good enough. And if they aren’t, this is your chance to tweak and improve them for next time.

Make a start, take action, speak up, even if you’re not 100% sure what you’re doing. You’ll learn as you go and make mistakes along the way, and that’s okay. Your mistakes give you the data you need to make better decisions in the future.

2. Don’t Be Perfect. Just Be Authentic

One of the biggest mistakes leaders make is trying to be someone they’re not.

They believe that to be an effective leader, they need to have all the answers, get everything right, and always be in control.

Your team will see through this facade pretty quickly, making them distrustful and uncomfortable. Sooner or later, your true colors will show, and you run the risk of losing their trust completely.

Besides, being a great leader requires a lot of energy, and keeping up a facade while you’re doing it is exhausting. Make things easier on yourself by cutting out the extra effort you’re putting into keeping up a false front.

Instead, be yourself. Let your authentic personality shine through. People will appreciate your honesty and transparency and feel more comfortable following your lead. And your example will give them the confidence to do the same, making them more effective, valuable, and productive members of your team.

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” — Oscar Wilde

Remember, leadership isn’t about being perfect – it’s about being real.

3. Honesty And Vulnerability Create Connection

As a leader, you might be feeling the pressure not to let the cracks show. But nobody has it together all the time, and being real and vulnerable will make you more likeable and relatable to your team. People are drawn to authenticity, and they appreciate leaders who aren’t afraid to show their humanity.

Vulnerability is a strength, not a weakness. Let your guard down from time to time. Share your fears and doubts with your team, and be open about the challenges you’re facing. They’ll appreciate your honesty and feel more connected to you as a result.

“The most important thing is to enjoy your life – to be happy – it’s all that matters.” — Dalai Lama

Remember, leadership isn’t about perfection. It’s about doing your best, treating people with respect, focusing on results, and continuing to improve. So lead already, even if you don’t have it all figured out!

4. Let Go Of Your Need For Control

It’s simply impossible to control everything related to your business. The sooner you realize this and learn to let go and trust others, the more impact you’ll be able to make.

Give your team the freedom to make their own decisions whenever possible. Trust them to do their jobs well and resist the temptation to micromanage. This will only frustrate them, and likely produce poorer results than if you had simply given them the direction they need to do their best work and left them alone.

The same principle applies to clients and other stakeholders. Accept that you can’t control how they behave or think, and focus on developing strategies that will work regardless of external factors. This is a hallmark of successful leadership – the ability to adapt to a changing world.

“You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.” — Maya Angelou

Focus on what is within your control, and let go of the rest. It’s not easy, but it is liberating. And that’s what leadership is all about.

5. Be Okay With Mistakes – They’re Part Of The Learning Process

You will make mistakes as a leader. It’s inevitable. But it’s how you deal with and learn from those mistakes that determines your success or failure.

The key is not to be afraid of mistakes. Instead, embrace them, and view them as opportunities for growth and learning. Every misstep and error in judgment teaches us something new and helps us become better leaders.

“Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.” — Rita Mae Brown

Experiment with shifting your mindset and start measuring success by the number of mistakes you make. Fail forward by taking a risk, making adjustments, and using your mistakes as a tool to uncover success. Fall, then get back up and try again. You’re human, and mistakes happen.

6. Embrace Your Imperfections – They’re What Make You Unique.

What makes you weird makes you great! When we embrace our imperfections, we become more authentic leaders. And by doing so, we show others that it’s okay to be themselves too.

If COVID and the shift to life and business over Zoom have taught us anything, it’s that leadership is not about being perfect – it’s about being yourself, flaws and all. Lean into what makes you extraordinary so you can lead in your unique way.

Breaking Free from Perfectionism

So how can we break free from the perfectionism trap to become the confident female leaders we know we can be?

First, we need to understand that there’s a big difference between striving for excellence and being a perfectionist. Excellence is about doing your best in every situation and learning from your mistakes. On the other hand, perfectionism is about never making mistakes, which just isn’t possible.

Secondly, we need to learn how to forgive ourselves. Acknowledge that you did your best. It may not have been good enough this time, but you’ve learned something valuable that you can apply in the future.

Finally, give yourself permission to move on. Don’t dwell on past failures or let them prevent you from trying again. The next time you try something new, know that you will make mistakes – and that’s okay!

Remember, leading with power isn’t about perfection. It’s about doing your best, treating people with respect, focusing on results, and striving to improve every time. So step up, take action and lead with confidence, even if you don’t have it all figured out yet.

Is perfectionism holding you back from stepping into your full potential as a leader? As a business strategist and founder/CEO of Free Range Thinking, I help creatives and executives develop their leadership style, build their team, and bring their vision to life. Schedule a conversation to discover how we can help!

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