Do you ever feel like you and your team don’t see eye-to-eye? If you’re struggling to delegate effectively, give and receive useful feedback or share a clear vision for your organization, it might be a case of conflicting communication styles.
We’re all unique in how we communicate, but there are four main “communication styles” that broadly describe how you interact (both verbally and non-verbally) and react in specific situations.
Why Are Communication Styles Important?
Poor communication is one of the most common reasons business partnerships and relationships fail. Understanding not only your communication style but also those of the people around you reduces conflict, makes it easier to work with people of different styles, and vastly improves the overall communication within and outside your organization.
So let’s talk about the four distinct types of communicators, how you can identify them, and the best way to relate to each one.
Communication Style #1: The Assertive Communicator
The assertive communicator is confident and directs their message straight to the listener. They use “I” statements, are clear and concise in their communication, and have a strong voice.
Assertive communicators are generally viewed as the most respectful and productive communicators at work. If this is you, you’re not afraid to challenge a point or decision or say “no” when you need to.
Tips For Communicating With An Assertive Communicator:
- Mirror their body language and match their tone and volume.
- Use short, concise sentences.
- Avoid interrupting them.
Communication Style #2: The Passive-Aggressive Communicator
The passive-aggressive communicator may seem indirect in their communication or avoid interacting altogether. They can send mixed messages and often fail to deliver on promises. This communication style is frustrating for others because it’s difficult to understand what they’re trying to get across. Worse still, it can feel manipulative, as if they say one thing but do another.
This is (usually) not intentional. Passive-aggressive communicators may just have difficulty expressing themselves clearly and feel frustrated because of it. If you recognize yourself here, think about what you could change to make your communication clearer for those around you.
Tips For Communicating With A Passive-Aggressive Communicator:
- Give them plenty of time to reflect and respond. They may need a while to think things through before they are ready to speak.
- Ask questions and make sure you understand their intention clearly. Don’t make assumptions about what they want or expect from you.
- Be clear about what you need and expect, and request feedback openly.
Communication Style #3: The Aggressive Communicator
The aggressive communicator is direct and forceful with how they communicate their message. They tend to be blunt, often coming across as harsh or rude when interacting with others. This style can put others on the defensive and create unnecessary conflict within an organization because of its confrontational tone.
If you recognize you’re an aggressive communicator, take a deep breath before starting a difficult conversation. Try working on positive communication techniques to improve your relationships and impact in the work setting.
Tips For Communicating With An Aggressive Communicator:
- Don’t take their words personally.
- Remain calm and assertive in your response.
- Avoid getting into a power struggle with them. Table the conversation if necessary.
- Let them know that you heard what they said but don’t necessarily agree with it.
Communication Styles #4: The Passive Communicator
Passive communicators tend to avoid conflict. They may agree or disagree with what you say but hold back from offering their input or viewpoint.
If you’re an overly passive communicator, it can help to prepare your thoughts in advance and practice speaking up in a safe environment first. This will give others the chance to benefit from your ideas and viewpoints more often. Try scheduling individual conversations rather than group meetings where possible. You may also find it easier to process your thoughts in writing, so communicate via email or messages if you feel you’re not being heard.
Tips For Communicating With A Passive Communicator:
- Be patient – they need time to think about what they want to say before speaking up in meetings or other group settings.
- Set clear expectations. If there is an urgent deadline, be sure this person understands exactly how long they have until the project needs to be completed.
- Set up one-on-one conversations to give them space to share their thoughts.
Build A Better Understanding To Bring Out The Best In Your Team
Understanding your own communication style is only the first step; you also need to know how those with different styles express themselves. This will make it easier for you to work with others who speak a different “language” than yours. It will also help you to reduce conflict, create a productive and positive company culture and make sure that everyone in your organization has the chance for their voice to be heard.
Communication styles are just one key part of the puzzle when it comes to building a better understanding of the people in your organization. If you want to learn more about figuring out what makes your team tick and how to apply that knowledge for maximum impact, download your free copy of our People Reading Guide here.
